Alien Abduction Reports Down 90% Following Creation of Space Force

Reports of alien abductions have decreased by 90% following President Trump’s announcement of the US Space Force.

While American citizens are excited about the new-age weaponry and wonder the Space Force will bring to mankind, there are numerous reports that field agents have already started to round-up aliens who are in America without legal status.

Separate, But Equal

The White House has promised to implement America’s eternally popular Separate But Equal policy in the creation of the Space Force.   The Air Force will have all the rights of the Space Force, but insiders speculate very quick budget adjustments could see the Space Force appropriating over $12.5 billion dollars in funding even before the 2019 fiscal budget planning season.